Monday, February 28, 2011

Hair is falling out...again

Lisa hair has started to fall out. Besides being a nuisance because it shows up everywhere...on pillows, shirts, floor, your's depressing. It's another physical reminder that this kid is sick. It's a total bummer and while you would think we would be used to it by now, the shock still runs thru me as my gut reaction in HOW will we do this? I know, the answer is...we just will, because we have to and we've done it before, but still the initial reaction takes my breath away and brings tears to my eyes. Lisa is fine with it....when asked is she wants a wig, she says no, just hats and tattoos on her head.

Other than the hair loss, Lisa had a great week last week. The kids and Mike were all home on winter break. The kids and I kept things pretty low key while Mike worked like a madman painting and updating bathrooms and other things around the house. I think it was his version of therapy....he could take something, fix it, make it better, he could control the outcome....something cancer has robbed us of.

Lisa's week consisted of eating, playing and goofing around. With a lot of mom willpower, she even went to her last ballet class. (That means her third for those who were counting). She did a great job even though she was having pain. She managed to even have fun and was very excited about getting a sucker at the end....ahhhh, the life lessons we learn from 6 year olds!

Unfortunately Lisa started off today by throwing up....she's fine now...eating breakfast and wanting to go to school. We think it was just congestion. She is scheduled to start chemo this week. We meet with doctor this afternoon to see if it's a go. Mike and I are on the fence how we feel about this. Without the chemo, her days are numbered. With the chemo, if she reacts the same way she did last time, her days are numbered and they are spent in bed with her feeling like she's dead.

I've come to realize we really do need a miracle to save her. Not a cure, but a good ole fashion water-to-wine, fish multiplying, laying of hands miracle. Interestingly enough the sermon at mass this weekend was "don't worry". Worry takes more energy than dealing with the problem one step at a time. So, we will face today, this week, this month, one step at a time. And, BELIEVE, BELIEVE, BELIEVE that God is watching over us and will choose to heal Lisa with a miracle.


Anonymous said...

Praying for a miracle!

Anonymous said...

Thank you for sharing. You are an incredibly amazing and inspiring family--you model such bravery and openess. I'm sending much positive energy and thoughts and many prayers your way.