Monday, August 31, 2020

Happy Sweet 16

Today Lisa would have turned sweet 16.   I try to imagine what she would have been like.  I think she still would have been a force to be reckoned with and if she decided she wanted something she would have figured out how to make it happen.  I have to believe she may have finally left the baby dolls at home but can’t help wondering if she would have become the go-to babysitter in the area.

Mike and I celebrated her birthday by taking a little trip to Ludington this weekend to visit some friends with a spontaneous detour on the way home to stay with my brother and sister-in-law at their cottage in Grey Lake.  Something Lisa would have totally approved of with her love to “just go”.  No doubt that being 16 she would have been driving.   This crazy covid year of 2020 has provided me constant reminders of what Lisa taught me.   Believe in something bigger than myself and my ability to persevere no matter how crazy things seem, Live life fully and if I can’t change the situation then work on changing my attitude, Aspire to do my best and appreciate what I have this minute because it could change in the next, Stay the course and sooner or later I’ll figure out how best to maneuver it, Tencacity is sometimes going to be the only way to keep going. 

As I think of Lisa today and miss her dearly I can’t help but think of all the others who have passed since she left us.  All of them leaving little holes in my heart and holes in the lives of their loved ones.    Many of them gone much sooner than what anyone deemed fair and leaving those of us behind spinning with questions and seeking understanding.  Every instance making me stop and think and wonder why them, why now, how does that happen, how do those of us left behind move forward?  We never seem to get the answers, and even when we do it doesn’t bring them back.  Somehow, we figure out how to move forward, often with sadness in our hearts and tears in our eyes, we get thru the next moment, the next hour, the next day.  It does become easier, sometimes.  We remind ourselves that our loved ones would want us to be happy and enjoying life.  We find others with whom we shared our loved ones and together we knit new days and new memories always keeping those who have left us tucked in the corner of our minds and our hearts.  We know and feel, some days more than others, that they are with us in spirit.

I would be remiss if I didn’t share that today, on Lisa’s 16th birthday, my heart is still torn at the loss of a very good friend Aaron Stotts.  He passed away on August 20th while on vacation with his family.  It was sudden and unexpected.  Aaron was one of Lisa’s biggest fans and the feeling was mutual as Lisa claimed Aaron as one of her many boyfriends.   Aaron, like Lisa, had a magnetic personality and was loved by many.  He was a key contributor in planning and making the BLAST fundraisers we did years ago a success.  Most people couldn’t say no to Aaron when he was seeking a donation, add Lisa to the mix, and wellllllll….those two were magic.    Aaron is missed by many and his loved ones are in my thoughts as we all push forward without him. 

I find a teeny tiny bit of solace in hoping that while both Lisa and Aaron were taken from us far too soon I have to believe those two are catching up in the afterlife and Aaron is making sure Lisa is having the sweet 16 celebration she deserves.

Miss you Lisa. Love you Lisa.  Happy Birthday!