Lisa and Maranda are doing well…unfortunately for me, I’ve been a bit melancholy. Not sure why, maybe just things catching up with me. Last Monday, Lisa had to go in for her stem cell infusion which is done to help boost her immunity and get her body back on track. Could have been the Monday blahs, but I was in a deep funk that got worse when we arrived at the hospital at 9:00. Once we were checked in, I found out that while the stem cell infusion would only take 45 minutes, Lisa had to have 4 hours of hydration before and after…meaning we were going to be there for close to 9 hours…arghhhhhh! I’d forgotten to pack food, left my money in the car and would be isolated with Lisa and Maranda in an adult room because of the type of treatment Lisa was getting. I sent out a desperate text to some friends and within seconds they were on the phone and made it to the hospital before an hour had gone by. Kim and Bridgette came bearing donuts, smiles and a shoulder to lean on. They did a great job keeping Lisa and Maranda occupied and made the day go by quickly. Thanks ladies!!
Treatment was finished up at 7:30 that evening and Lisa, Maranda and I raced across town to meet Mike, Chrissy, and Tom at a MotorCity Hogs Biker meeting to promote the fundraiser bike run. Lisa was amazing….many times she gets shy and is resistant to going into crowds….not that night! She was skipping around and handing out her cards all over the place. I guess being properly hydrated can really effect your energy level! Or it could have been that Natalie just happened to know how to get one of the princesses on the phone and that was all the motivation Lisa needed!
The rest of the week was spent working, having meetings with teachers at the schools regarding Thomas and Christina schoolwork and trying to catch Maranda up with her schoolwork. There were some high points of the week, like going to the Comedy Club and having Lisa’s school sell some suckers and promote the fundraisers during young author’s night.
We had a nice time celebrating Tom’s 12th birthday on Friday and even more fun when a horse called Moe paid a house visit on Saturday. Camp Casey, a wonderful organization, had read the blog months ago and contacted me about paying a visit to the house. It was very fun. The kids got to groom Moe, learned about saddling a horse, do a craft, make horse treats for Moe, eat pizza that Camp Casey had arranged to be delivered, and best of all, got to ride Moe down to the end of the block and back. I think it’s the first time people have ever slowed down on our street…I kept wondering if we would end up being in a new Dr. Seuss book…”And to Think that I Saw It On Elmhurst Street”….we certainly do have a lot of unusual things happen to us!
Saturday and Sunday we enjoyed the weather and having no scheduled activities. My mood switched once more back to melancholy as I realized that Lisa’s hair had begun to fall out. Friday and Saturday I notice a few strands here and there. Today, it’s really starting to come out. Mike and I kept hoping it wasn’t going to happen. I got pretty emotional about it giving Lisa a bath tonight. Maranda questioned my tears “Why are you so upset…Lisa’s lost her hair before…it’s normal when you have chemo.” I couldn’t answer…while Maranda’s thought process is completely logical, my mind had gone to a place where anger and pity hangs out and I found myself thinking “Good God, this is what we think of as normal now, this is what is to be “expected”…I just want my old life back, I just want this to all be over, I just want Lisa to be “normal” and “have hair…really, is it too much to ask?”. Two years of doing this, you would think I would know that the person is more important than the hair…but really, I just want Lisa to have her life back…I want her to grow up and have babies and do and have all the things little girls dream about. I’m still in denial about what this beastly disease may rob us of…I still hold on to hope and miracles and lock away all the truth and reality…I force myself to remember that we have Lisa and our loved ones today and can’t worry about them being gone in the future….I use lots of energy to stay away from the dark shadows of my mind and that may be the reason for some melancholy this week.
I know that life goes on, it’s a bumpy ride, and there are lots of ups and downs. I have to just keep hanging on and thinking good thoughts.
Hope you do to!
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1 comment:
All I can say is why? why? why?
Love you guy's
Tell Lisa we have a special do rag coming her way with a little crown on the back.....and maybe Cinderella will wear one too!!
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