Happy 4th of July

Hope everyone is having a great holiday and taking some time to enjoy life.

We've had a good past few weeks and we've been doing my best to take the kids on outings to make up for last summer. We've been to Camp Dearborn, went bowling last week and yesterday we took the kids to the African Safari in OH. They all enjoyed themselves and Lisa loved the animals. She even got picked to help with one of the magic tricks on stage and she was in one of her "performing" modes and marched up to the stage as she called out "they want me Mom."

Still trying to stay positive and upbeat and believe Lisa has beat this monster. Unfortunately, I still worry and become concerned when Lisa says her leg hurts or I notice she seems to be tripping a lot....I guess you just can't erase those memories even though you have the best intentions to move on. The latest email from her doctor has also raised my anxiety level. She wrote:

Just wanted to let you know that Lisa's urine tests finally came back late last week. They were both about the same as they have been for the previous several checks, but they are a little higher than we'd really like. 16.1 was the HVA with the normal cut off being 16. We don't need to do anything different because the scans would be the next step. We already have those scheduled in a few weeks. I'm going to add a bone marrow biopsy as well.So you are not allowed to get more worried yet, but I'll let you know if you should later!!

(For more info on the test and what it indicates, click here.)

ok...so the doctor and I joke about the words "more worried" but they are pretty accurate. The worry seems to always be there, I just need to keep it in check to make sure I don't become paranoid. I guess that goes with being a caregiver for anyone or thing....everyone worries about others, whether it's wondering if their child is safe biking alone to a friends house or if their dog is getting arthritis.....you just have to focus on the positive and try not to make yourself crazy with everything that could go wrong. Sooooooooo....even though Lisa's urine tests have increased, I have to stay focused on the positive. She looks good, she's eating, she's happy and she's having fun. Even if the cancer is re-emerging, there isn't one damn thing I could be doing right now to change things....except pray...which I do....every day.

On that note, I will end this downward spiral of negativity and ask that all you readers go out and enjoy the day, focus on the positive and, as always, offer up an extra prayer for Lisa.

Thanks and Happy 4th!